But as Margot got older the hours away got harder. When she started talking about our situation I suddenly started to feel very different. Little phrases like, "I'm the Mama, I go to work, Nammy takes care of my baby" just broke my heart. Dragging her out of bed at the crack of dawn and putting her in a cold car when all she wanted to do was snuggle because I had an early meeting was horrid. And the daily greeting of "oh Mama, I missed you" and "don't leave me Mama, please stay with me" soon were becoming more than I could take. Work started to loose its appeal and I really started to question my decision. At this point we had already bought a more expensive house, we are still paying off law school loans and preschool was a looming expense. And suddenly I felt very very stuck.
So when out of the blue came the opportunity to move to a new town, for Chris to take a more stable and secure job that he wanted, for me consider leaving my job...well the decision seemed blatantly obvious. Politics and I had a good run. I did the working Mom thing. Now it was time for a change.
At some point in the not so distant future our house will sell and I will pack up my office and say goodbye to all my great friends and colleagues. I will leave my 9 years of political/policy work behind and will focus my time an energy solely on Chris and Margot, our house and our new community. I honestly don't really know what to expect. I have some ideas that I'm sure are naive and unrealistic about how it will be. I really hope I have more time to things I love like cooking, decorating and art. I hope that this removes a lot of the stress from our household. But regardless of the day to day I know that right now this is the best decision for our family. I'm sure I will work in some capacity in the future whether it's in politics or something else. But I am looking forward to some time and space to figure out what I would like that to be. Mostly though I am really grateful that we have this opportunity.